Pick Up "The Black Phone"

I appreciate that "The Black Phone" is a very specific, very personal piece of horror.  It takes place in the midwestern America suburbia of the late 1970s, a more dangerous era for kids.  Our protagonists are a pair of siblings, 13 year-old Finney (Mason Thames) and his slightly younger sister Gwen (Madeleine McGraw).  Their father, played by Jeremy Davies, is an abusive alcoholic and Finney is regularly targeted by local bullies.  So things are already bad for these two before a serial child-killer, The Grabber (Ethan Hawke), comes into their lives.    

Based on a short story by Joe Hill, "The Black Phone" is working with some very familiar parts and pieces.  The most obvious are the Stephen King media starring kids, especially "IT," but also all the nostalgic throwbacks to various '70s and '80s horror that we've seen lately.  "The Black Phone" wants to make the point that actually living through this time was a lot rougher than "Stranger Things" would have you believe.  Kids had more freedom, but there were also  far fewer safeguards.  Arguably the most upsetting scenes in "The Black Phone" are the early ones, where Gwen is beaten by her father, and where Finney is attacked by bullies.  Gwen's a spitfire who won't hesitate to curse out cops or tackle a boy twice her size, but Finney needs to toughen up.  And when he's targeted by the Grabber, this becomes a matter of life or death.

This premise may sound overly glum, but "The Black Phone" is designed to be a crowd pleaser, and an efficient delivery system for setups and payoffs that are very satisfying to see play out.  However, it also demands more from its audience than most.  The Grabber is a great new movie monster, and the great part is that we know very little about him.  "The Black Phone" has ghosts and prophetic dreams and this psycho killer who likes to dress in freaky costumes and play freaky games, and we're never given the rules for how any of it works.  The audience has to actively try and connect the dots themselves.  I suspect the horror literate, who are more familiar with these concepts, will enjoy the film more than the casual viewers for this reason.  If you need the Grabber to have a backstory and an explanation for his particular strand of psychopathy, I'm sure there will be a sequel coming along in a few years, but I like that writer/director Scott Derrickson and his co-writer C. Robert Cargill let the mystery be for this first outing.  

The scale of the movie stays limited to the experiences of Finny and Gwen, which keeps it appropriately kid-sized.  This is a Blumhouse production from the guys who made "Sinister," so the budget is small, but "The Black Phone" doesn't cut corners, and occasionally delivers some pretty gorgeous horror imagery.  There's a lot of attention paid to getting the little period details right, and both of the main child actors are given the space to give full, nuanced performances.  The movie rests almost entirely on their shoulders, and while there are the occasional awkward moments toward the beginning, they deliver when it counts.  There's so much inherent suspense and drama that comes with scenarios of kids in realistic peril, it would have been easy to do too much.  Thankfully, the filmmakers picked the right kids for the job and trusted them.    

I haven't said much about the plot, because it's best to go in with as little information as possible.  I'll just say that there's not much original here, and the trailer gives away enough that a sharp viewer could probably  guess how everything plays out just from that.  However, the old tropes and ideas are executed with great skill, by people who clearly care about the material.  I'm not remotely surprised that Derrickson based a lot of the film's vision of suburban hell on his own childhood, and I'm sure everyone involved grew up on traumatic Stephen King movies.  There's some potent nostalgia at work, and not the pleasant kind, and that's a nice change of pace, honestly.  This feels like one of those films that doesn't come along often anymore - an R-rated film that is unambiguously mature and horrific, while still genuinely being about kids and childhood. 

  

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My Top Ten "Kids in the Hall" Sketches (New to Me)

After watching the entire 1989-1995 "Kids in the Hall" series, and realizing how much of it was completely new to me, I decided to compile a list of my favorite sketches that I hadn't seen when I originally watched the show, over twenty years ago.  Broader thoughts on the whole series were discussed in the previous post, but this time I want to get into specific sketches.

I'll be referring to the cast by their first names, because I don't care to keep typing out Foley, Thompson, McKinney, McDonald, and McCullough.  And after over a hundred episodes, I think we're past the need for formalities.

My original Top Ten list is here.

Brian's Bombshell - This time around, I was much more interested in the show's more down-to-earth characters.  Fran, played by Scott, was almost immediately a favorite, a caricature of a long-suffering, narrow-minded, middle-aged housewife.  Her first appearance was in the pilot, alongside her asshole spouse Gordon, and wayward son Brian.  Fran monologues as she hangs laundry, worries about her family, casually drops the n-word, and is altogether sincerely loveable and groan-worthy.

Indian Drum - Mark has cymbals and is screaming about his missing Indian drum, Kevin has the missing drum and is screaming about finding it, and I temporarily lost the ability to breathe.  This one is so brief, but acts as a concentrated dose of pure absurdity.  Something about how the guys are positioned on different floors of a building, the rat-a-tat pattern of the dialogue, and the fact that they're shouting these missives past each other is just perfect.  It's human Muppets, and I mean that as a compliment.

Comfortable - My favorite new find.  I love how Scott keeps getting more outrageous, and the audience is eating it up.  "Kids in the Hall" is known for pushing boundaries, and this is one of the best examples of their willingness to escalate into pretty wild territory.  The stage version is supposed to be even raunchier, apparently once resulting in a broken table.  The sketch wouldn't work, however, if the characters didn't work as characters.  In the end I found myself sympathizing with poor Nina for her terrible faux pas.  

Dead Dad - I wanted to put "Womyn" here, but I know it's one I saw long ago and just didn't appreciate as much at the time.  So, let's move on to the similar "Dead Dad," another of the semi-recurring sketches with all five of the Kids playing versions of themselves, hanging out, having an insane conversation.  Here they talk about fighting their dads, which fits right in with the show's obsession with dysfunctional families, and shows off each of their quirks - Kevin is a coward, Mark values consistency, etc.  

Raise - An exercise in meta humor, where Kevin and Dave navigate Dave's poorly written sketch about a guy asking for a raise.  After some banter about lazy writing and stupid character names, Kevin discovers that Dave has neglected to write an ending, trapping them both there.  If that weren't enough, this turns out to be a two-parter, and we check in on the pair in a second segment, twenty days later, grimly facing their doom as supplies run low.  And all that Dave can offer is more stupid character names.

Opened Up - The Kevin and Dave pairings are usually my favorites because Kevin's great at playing the insecure dweeb, and Dave delivers prime sardonic evil, and it's even funnier when they switch roles.  They play a lot of variations on this, most famously as Simon and Hecubus. In "Opened Up," it's this dynamic at an office party, plus a subversion that is played out for exactly as long as it should be, with a great ending punchline.  I still have this in my notes as the "Hey, Fifty Bucks!" sketch.     

The Beard - I think Kevin and Mark have probably grown on me the most as performers as I revisited the show this time.  This sketch is completely dependent on Kevin's performance, and he really sells his character's descent into vacation beard-fuelled madness.  There's really not much to the premise beyond a common horror framework, but Kevin makes it absolutely hysterical to see play out.  I think this is one of the best filmed pieces from the show's final seasons.  Oh look, and it's Nina again!

New Boots - Bruce is probably the Kids member who is the most hit-or-miss for me, but when he scores a hit, it's usually a great one.  I love "New Boots" because I had no idea where it was going, even though so much of it is telegraphed far in advance.  The whole bit with testing out the steel-toed boots in painful ways is a perfect distraction from what's really going on.  The production quality here is especially impressive, using good sound design and some choice shots to really sell the punchlines.  

Rockey - I can't make heads or tails of the title, but this one boils down to a four minute version of "Click," where every time Kevin leaves the room, he comes back to find his girlfriend, played by Dave, has drastically fast-forwarded to a different point in life.  This one's all in the execution, where Kevin's bewildered reaction shots are doing half the work, and Dave's absolute sincerity will tolerate no questioning.  So much of this one depends on getting the timing exactly right, and they get it right.

Step Class - Finally, the Kids' willingness to wear ridiculous outfits and make themselves up into these ostentatious characters is a big part of their appeal.  The second I saw Bruce and Mark in the leotards, the leggings, and the big '80s hair wigs to play rival aerobics instructors, I was already on the floor.  The resulting catfight and Scott showing up in a coral activewear ensemble was just the icing on the cake. 

Honorable Mentions: Womyn, Lady is a Tramp, Go For Guilt, I Can't Play the Piano, Emergency Troupe Meeting, Reg, Skoora!, Sex Girl Patrol, Brucio, Relocation, and Poor Richard 

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Does "The Kids in the Hall" Hold Up?

I've finished watching all 101 episodes of the original 1989-1995 run of "The Kids in the Hall."  While I became a fan through watching the reruns in college decades ago, I'd never seen the full, unedited versions before.  I estimate that roughly half of the episodes were completely new to me.  I'd never seen any of the sketches with the "Extreme" or "Steps" characters, no Tammy, no Croation cabbie, and I never knew there was more than one sketch with the King of Empty Promises.  With the recent revival of the series in 2022, "Kids in the Hall" is seeing a nice resurgence of popularity, and there have been a lot of old fans coming out of the woodwork and remarking about how well the show has held up compared to other comedy of its time.  

Well, some of it has and some of it hasn't.  There's no getting away from how different the culture was in the late '80s and early '90s.  While "Kids" was very ahead of its time in terms of portraying women and the LGBT community, it was pretty miserable every time it tried to do anything with race.  The five members of the Kids in the Hall comedy troupe, Dave Foley, Scott Thompson, Mark McKinney, Bruce McCullough, and Kevin McDonald, are all white men.  They wrote sketches with women in them and would play the parts themselves in drag.  And they also wrote sketches with black and brown people in them occasionally, and appeared in blackface and brownface to play them.  Mark McKinney's blues musician character Mississippi Gary showed up in the very first episode, made appearances on the show until the third season, and later popped up in their live shows, rewritten to be a very out-of-touch white guy in blackface.  There's not an ounce of malice in any of these sketches, but the cringe is off the charts.

Then there's the LGBT content.  Scott Thompson was one of the only out gay comedians at the time, and "The Kids in the Hall" ran during the height of the AIDS crisis when homophobia was rampant.  Thompson used his unusual visibility to fight back as best he could, even devoting one of his Buddy Cole monologues to calling out haters like Andrew Dice Clay and Sam Kinison.  The f-slur is all over the show, and from interviews I've dug up, this was deliberate on Thompson's part - he wanted to reclaim the word the way that "queer" eventually would be.  This didn't work out, and now the culture has changed so drastically since "The Kids in the Hall" went off the air that some of these sketches need an awful lot of additional context and qualifiers to parse.  However, they're also a fascinating encapsulation of the prevailing attitudes of the times, and really should be in wider circulation.     

I got so much out of working my way through the whole show in order, seeing how the characters evolved, and how the production kept getting more ambitious and impressive every season.  In year one, most of the sketches were adapted from the troupe's existing stage material, and everything felt much more scroungy and low budget.  As the show gained momentum, more and more filmed pieces were incorporated, and everyone eventually figured out how to write for television.  The costuming and makeup went from barely passable in the first season to jaw-dropping quality in the fifth.  Even now, there were instances where I completely forgot Dave Foley in drag wasn't actually a woman, because the work was just that good.  

"Kids in the Hall" is unusual for a sketch show because it is an unapologetically provocative and adult piece of work, with material that kept it from ever becoming mainstream, but it ran for over a hundred episodes.  It was also remarkably consistent, maybe because it all came from the same small group of comedians who got away with more than people thought they could.  Not every sketch was a winner, and the show had its ups and downs in quality, and inevitable bouts of repetitiveness, but when it worked, it worked.  The absurdism and the rebelliousness and the GenX worldview of "Kids in the Hall" made it distinctive and memorable.  It's more nostalgic than subversive now, and some elements are very out of date, but I'd argue that more of it holds up than not.    

As much as I love the weirder characters, the show's enduring fascination with and hatred of corporate culture and dysfunctional families was what really drove it, and those themes have stayed pretty universal and relevant.  I'll get into that more in the next installment, where I talk about the top ten sketches that were new to me from watching "Kids in the Hall"  this time around.

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My 2022 Youtube Playlist

My yearly Youtube playlist is mostly made up of media ephemera that's difficult to categorize, and the only thing they really have in common is utilizing a strong musical element. Still, I think that they're worth recommending and writing about. This batch includes film segments, tie-in music videos, award show hijinks, and oddball musical numbers you probably forgot about

So May We Start - I was looking forward to "Annette," the big musical collaboration between French filmmaker Leos Carax and Canadian musicians, Sparks, consisting of Ron and Russell Mael.  I ended up being fairly cool on the movie, but the opening number is fantastic, and the best way I can think of to start this list.  

Sooner or Later - We lost Stephen Sondheim not too long ago, and among his many credits are the songs for the 1990 film "Dick Tracy," including this jazz  number for Madonna's character, Breathless Mahoney.  Madonna in this clip is performing at the 1991 Academy Awards, where "Sooner or Later" won Best Original Song.  Of all the '80s icons who have been getting time in the limelight lately, I think Madonna is well overdue for more recognition.  

I Enjoy Being A Girl - Carol Burnett, Chita Rivera, and Caterina Valente sing this number from Rodgers and Hammerstein's "Flower Drum Song," while dressed up like creatures of the night - with Boris Karloff dropping in for a quick cameo.  This performance was taken from a 1965 episode of "The Entertainers," a short-lived variety show that Burnett and Valente hosted with Bob Newhart.

The Animaniacs Suite - The final episode of "Animaniacs" that aired in 1998 included a clip montage with a seven-minute medley of the show's musical themes, arranged by Richard Stone and played by the Warner Bros. Studio Symphony.  And boy, the music has never sounded better, including the orchestral arrangements of "Pinky and the Brain," "Slappy Squirrel," "Rita and Runt," "Goodfeathers," and "Mindy and Buttons" themes.

We're Doing a Sequel - This is the extended version of the opening to "Muppets Most Wanted," which happily pokes fun at selling out and bad sequels.  I love that it also predicts the inevitability of "Toy Story 4."  The song was written by "Flight of the Conchords" veteran Bret McKenzie, and features vocals from Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett and all of our favorite muppets.  Say what you like about "Muppets Most Wanted," but the music didn't lose a step.  

Let's Live For Today - The Apple TV+ series "Pachinko" deserves so much more recognition that it's gotten for the fantastic first season.  Its lone Emmy nomination was for its main titles, so here they are.  Set to The Grass Roots' cover of "Let's Live for Today," (originally an Italian song from Shel Shapiro, Mogol, and Michael Julien), here's the main cast of "Pachinko" dancing in the pachinko parlor, briefly putting their cares aside.

I'm Still Here - "Treasure Planet" has quietly become a cult favorite since its disastrous release in 2003.  Goo Goo Dolls member John Rzeznik, contributed two songs to the movie's soundtrack, "I'm Still Here" and "Always Know Where You Are."  I've linked the little seen music video for "I'm Still Here," which features some "Treasure Planet" iconography.  It's an interesting curiosity, part of the ephemera of a film that Disney likes to pretend doesn't exist.  

Suspirium - I loved the Luca Guadagnino remake of "Suspiria," but one nagging issue I had was with Thom Yorke's music.  Maybe it was because I missed the Goblins, or maybe it was because it was just so different from what I expected, but I thought York's work was a total mismatch.  Since then, it's grown on me considerably, particularly the title track.  Here's the official music video, accompanied by animation from Russ Murphy/RUFFMERCY.

The Gay Men's Chorus of Los Angeles at the 2020 Independent Spirit Awards - They are here to honor LGBTQ representation in film and, of course, Laura Dern.  

We Think We Know You - Finally, I think this is my favorite thing that Bo Burnham has ever done, which is more performance art than it is comedy or musical satire.  "We Think We Know You" is the finale of his 2013 comedy special "what," which he released free on Youtube.  There are several clips of older performances of this piece, in different stages of its creation, littering social media and other video platforms, but this is the full, perfected, version, and it's a stunner.  

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"The Sandman" (With Spoilers)

Spoiler warnings for the first season, but I'll avoid anything from future comics arcs.

I think the "24/7" episode, the adaptation of the comic stories "24 Hours" and "Sound and Fury" is a good encapsulation of some of my doubts about the series.  "24 Hours," about John Dee experimenting on the patrons of a diner, is one of the darkest stories I've ever encountered in any medium, and I was half-anticipating and half-dreading the adaptation.  The version that appears in the Netflix series retains the broad outlines of what happens, but the specifics are very different.  It's much more of a slow burn psychological thriller that glosses over the horrific outcomes much more quickly.  The episode is very good at being a one-location stand alone story, with excellent performances by David Thewlis and the rest of the cast, but then it shoves all of "Sound and Fury" into about ten minutes at the end, and glosses over all the damage that John Dee and the ruby caused outside of the diner.  The whole climax of this arc is incredibly rushed, and I'm not sure if people who weren't familiar with the comic could follow what was going on.

This is probably the most egregious example of adaptation issues in the whole show, but they do keep cropping up.  There's no attempt to explain how Unity Kincaid (Sandra James-Young) managed to live to be over 110, for instance, or to make the climactic cereal convention more plausible.  I was delighted that the convention story was adapted, in all of its darkly comedic glory, with so many of the awful visual gags intact.  However, I sympathize with those viewers who took one look at the sinister attendees and wondered how they could have possibly thought they were fooling anybody.  Frankly, it's a miracle that any of the "Sandman" works in live action as well as it does.  As much as I might bemoan the never-ending encroachment of CGI, there is no way that a show like "Sandman" could exist without it.  Also, it was a lovely surprise to discover that some of the stories work very well onscreen, including the potent "The Sound of Her Wings" and "Men of Good Fortune" combo that followed "24/7."  If the show continues past the first season, I hope that the creators will lean into its anthology nature more.        

What I appreciate the most about the show, after seeing so many other remakes and reboots lately, is that Neil Gaiman and Alan Heinberg allowed many of the characters to be different, and make different choices.  The parts of the series that don't work, often don't work because they're too faithful to the comics.  Did we really need all of the eccentrics from the boarding house run by Hal (John Cameron Mitchell) in the show?  Initially I was worried when the Corinthian and John Dee were being made more sane and less monstrous, but this also makes them more compelling characters to follow.  Yes, Dream is more human and less otherworldly, but there's a wonderful balance maintained between making him a god-like creature, and ensuring that he's still sympathetic.  He kills Gregory because the story needs more stakes, but he brings back Gault (Ann Ogbomo) (a big upgrade from Brute and Glob) to show that he's capable of reform.  I find myself thinking of Dream not as an extension of the Dream from the comics, but an entirely new version that only exists in the television series.  And I'm rooting for him.

There's been a lot of commentary about so many prominent characters in the show being black women, including Death, Lucienne, Gault, Rosemary (Sarah Niles), and Rose Walker (Vanesu Samunyai).  This feels like Neil Gaiman recognizing a major representation problem from the original comics, where there was a disturbing motif of black women burning to death.  I'm not saying that this was a conscious choice.  Who knows?  Maybe the old line about picking the best actors for the roles, and they all just happened to be black women is really, honestly true this time.  I'm convinced it's the case for Kirby Howell-Baptiste, who is the best Death I ever could have hoped for.  That said, the dodgy VFX trying to show the literal shadow of her wings is terrible.  So much of the effects work in this show looks great, but some of the little design choices like this, and Lucifer's outfits boggle me.    

And of course, a big part of that is because I am a massive "Sandman" fan, and there was no way I was ever going to be totally satisfied with any screen version.  I spent years wondering what the show's opening credits sequence would look like, and the Netflix show doesn't have one.  However, it does have Abel (Asim Chaudhry) and Cain (Sanjeev Bhaskar) and Irving/Goldie.  And it does have Hob Gadling. And it has me hyped up for a second season, right when I thought I was done being hyped up for anything.  It feels very, very good to know the show is in the right hands, and to be able to wholeheartedly recommend this to people alongside the comics.

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"The Sandman" (Without Spoilers)

I've been waiting for an adaptation of Neil Gaiman's "Sandman" comics for roughly twenty years now, and I have a lot to say about the Netflix show.  I'll be devoting two posts to it - first a general review with thoughts on how "Sandman" fits into the current superhero industrial complex, and next time a spoilery analysis that will get into the details of changes from the comics, and all the plotty bits.

I'm incredibly curious about how the general public is going to react to "The Sandman," because it's not your typical comic book superhero or YA fantasy show, despite sharing some characteristics with each.  It's an unusually faithful adaptation of the "Sandman" DC comics for adult readers, which gained a cult following among people who didn't normally read comics, and had more storytelling ambitions than any other comic being written at the time.  The main character, Dream (Tom Sturridge), aka the Sandman, aka Morpheus, is one of the Endless, a powerful, immortal family of beings that embody and look after some of the primal forces of the universe.  Dream rules over a realm called The Dreaming, inhabited by dreams and nightmares. In 1919, an occult practitioner, Roderick Burgess (Charles Dance), manages to summon and capture Dream, with terrible consequences.

Eventually Dream escapes, and we spend the rest of the ten-episode season watching him track down and recover his lost tools and items of power, hunt wayward nightmares, and try to put his kingdom back in order.  Some have taken advantage of his absence, such as The Corinthian (Boyd Holbrook), a charming nightmare who has rows of teeth where eyes should be, and a reality-warping madman named John Dee (David Thewlis).  There is a lot of violence and a fair amount of sex in "The Sandman,"  though the show has steered away from the episodes of out-and-out horror that characterized the early issues of the comic.  I can't emphasize enough how rare it is to see this kind of very adult, but very sincere and thoughtful urban fantasy brought to the screen with the kind of budget and resources that "Sandman" has.  There's a ton of CGI imagery to bring talking ravens and puppyish gargoyles to life, as well as to send Dream on a quest to Hell, and to travel through the dreams of the unconscious.  The cast, which includes Gwendolyn Christie, Mark Hamill, Patton Oswalt, and Stephen Fry, is extraordinary.  

 

I like the end result, but not as much as I want to like it.  There are inevitably things that are going to be lost in any adaptation, and I suspect that disappointments are inevitable when you've had your own personal vision of something percolating in your head for twenty years.  I think the best thing I can say about Netflix's "Sandman" is that I like all of the additions - new characters, new motives, and new details to help update the material.  However, I can't help missing the strong visual elements from the comics.  "Sandman" was created at the end of the '80s, and alternative and goth aesthetics were a big part of the book's DNA.  Now that the action has been moved to the present day, all the rough edges are gone.  There's a blandness and a cleanness to the look of the show that makes everything look very shiny and impressive, but awfully safe.  Dream has gone from looking like a badass '80s rock star to a much more ordinary human being.  Sturridge does well in an impossible role, but there's room for improvement.  

On the other hand, other changes have been excellent.  Lots of the characters benefit from race and gender blind casting, so Dream's librarian Lucien is now the loyal Lucienne (Vivienne Acheampong), his sister Death is played by the lovely, dark-skinned Kirby Howell Baptiste, and Lucifer (Christie) looks less like David Bowie and more like Brienne of Tarth.  The rights to DC universe exorcist John Constantine are tied up, so he's been swapped out for Gaiman's original creation, Johanna Constantine (Jenna Coleman).  "Sandman" was always known for its strong LGBT representation, and that continues here, with characters like the nonbinary Desire (Mason Alexander Park).  There's also been a lot of careful streamlining of the story, and most of the villains are treated with more sympathy.  The edgy nihilism of some of the darkest stories has been curbed, as it doesn't really fit how the rest of the series plays out.  However, the creators found ways to retain many of the little one-off characters and side stories that made "Sandman" so unique, like Hob Gadling (Ferdinand Kingsley), the immortal man that Dream has a drink with once every century. 

Part of me is still getting used to the idea that this series actually exists, and has been made with enough fidelity that I can actually criticize things like how the story arcs have been rearranged, and which characters need more screen time.  It's difficult to say if some of my issues with certain episodes are due to  being much too familiar with the comics, but there have been as many hits as misses, and the hits have been better than I ever dreamed possible.  It's going to take me a while to fully process, but it looks like "The Sandman" has finally made it to the small screen, and the wait was worth it.

More next time.

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Indulging in "Uncoupled"

I was under the mistaken impression that "Uncoupled" was a feature film, but the new Netflix series is only the length of two feature films, with eight half-hour episodes.  Created by Darren Star and Jeffrey Richman, we are back in a very "Sex in the City" version of New York, this time looking at the breakup of Michael (Neil Patrick Harris) and Colin (Tuc Watkins), a gay couple who have been together for seventeen years.  Michael is initially mystified by the split, and spends the early episodes trying frantically to repair the relationship before facing the unappetizing reality of being single and in his forties.

"Uncoupled" wants very much to present the state of modern romance from an LGBT point of view, celebrating the community and the new opportunities afforded by technology and cultural improvements.  At the same time, it wants to show off how good Neil Patrick Harris and other members of the cast looks shirtless, and indulge in a familiar, fantasy version of New York.  This is definitely a rom-com universe, where nearly everyone is handsome and rich, or at least witty and refined.  Michael is a real estate agent, who with his business partner Suzanne (Tisha Campbell), spends several episodes touring ungodly expensive New York real estate, and trying to stay in the good graces of a demanding client played by Marcia Gay Harden.  Michael's friend group includes playboy weatherman Billy (Emeson Brooks) and gallery owner Stanley (Brooks Ashmanskas), both also perpetually single and gay.  Suzanne is both the only straight and the only woman in their circle, and Tisha Campbell is more than able to hold her own.  

This is actually the first piece of media I've seen Neil Patrick Harris in in some time, because I skipped out on "How I Met Your Mother" and most of the "Harold and Kumar" movies.  He's extremely charming here, and good at playing someone who is simultaneously very lovable and full of obvious, exasperating faults.  Though we spend a lot of time watching Michael struggle to get back into the dating scene, with some success, I appreciate that "Uncoupled" really is about Michael and Colin's relationship all the way through.  Even when Colin disappears for several episodes, getting on with his own post-breakup life, his presence looms large.  Also, I like that the breakup isn't anybody's fault, and Colin is never really in the wrong.  He's positioned as an antagonist a few times, naturally, but usually because of miscommunications and Michael projecting his own insecurities.  It's very satisfying to watch Michael move through all the different stages of a breakup, and see how it impacts subsequent relationships.

I am very impressed with how well written the show is.  The show functions like a sitcom, constantly coming up with little dilemmas and new faces that only last an episode or two.  Its ongoing storylines, however, all tend to move quickly and never stagnate.  Marcia Gay Harden's difficult client keeps coming back into Michael's life for different reasons, and by the end of the season she's been repositioned as a more casual acquaintance, still on her own journey of self-discovery.  Colin and Michael mostly avoid each other, but when they do intersect, it doesn't feel manufactured.  When Michael's mother (Stephanie Faracy) has an accident, of course Colin drops by to see her because he's developed his own relationship with her over the course of his and Michael's relationship.  

As the series goes on, "Uncoupled" slowly morphs into an ensemble series.  If the show gets additional seasons, I hope that it leans into this.  Michael's friend group becomes his most important emotional support, and the personalities are a good mix of fun types.  A lot of good character actors show up for smaller roles, including Andre de Shields as Michael's elderly neighbor.  The last episode, involving a big wedding, shamelessly sets up a bunch of different cliffhangers and loose plot threads for everyone - including Colin, who is not out of the picture yet.  It's easy to point to "Uncoupled" as a gay "Sex and the City" wannabe, but I don't see how anyone could object to a gay "Sex and the City" wannabe that offers this much easy, watchable fun.   

Oh, and content warnings for sexual content, though it's fairly tame for 2022.  There's a whole episode devoted to talking about dick pics, but only fleeting glimpses of actual nudity. 

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"Cha Cha Real Smooth" and "Dinner in America"

There's been some buzz around the recent Sundance film "Cha Cha Real Smooth," a contemporary coming of age picture.  Cooper Raiff directs and stars as Andrew, an aimless post-grad who has moved back in with his mother and stepfather (Leslie Mann, Brad Garrett), while figuring out his next steps.  While taking his younger brother David (Evan Assante) to a Bar Mitzvah, he meets an autistic girl named Lola (Vanessa Burghardt) and her mother Domino (Dakota Johnson).  Andrew's efforts to impress Domino and Lola result in him getting work as a party starter, and occasionally as Lola's babysitter.

"Cha Cha" occasionally feels like it's in conversation with older films like "The Graduate," specifically in the way that the protagonist faces a prospective romance with an older woman, and struggles to navigate the expectations of everyone around him.  However, Andrew is more empathetic and aware of the damage he can cause, and the universe he inhabits is gentler and less cynical.  Youthful rebellion and sexual transgressions are tempting, but Andrew quickly learns that the consequences aren't worth it.  As coming-of-age films go, "Cha Cha" comes across as well-meaning but toothless.  Andrew often feels like he's operating on the sidelines of a more interesting movie, and the other characters are a little too conveniently constructed to teach him life lessons - Domino in particular.     

Cooper Raiff is an appealing screen presence, and I admire his ability to bring suburban anomie of a specific cultural context to the screen.  I have never been to a Bar Mitzvah, but I know the awkward party atmosphere and the clusters of gossiping, hovering parents all too well.  However, there's little about "Cha Cha Real Smooth" that helps it to stand out from so many other indie films about awkward twenty-somethings learning how to adult.  Dependable actors like Dakota Johnson and Leslie Mann are barely given anything to work with, and Raiff frankly wears out his welcome long before the film is finished.  I like the intentions behind the story, and the filmmaking is promising, but this one is a miss.

Meanwhile, a Sundance 2020 premiere has emerged at last, to make the case that punk is not dead.  Kyle Gallner plays a young reprobate named Simon, who goes on the run after a potential love connection goes wrong.  He ends up hiding out with Patty (Emily Skeggs), a former classmate with a non-specified intellectual disability.  She lives with a stifling (but easily manipulated) family, and her only escape is the punk music of the band PSYOPS, fronted by the mysterious masked lead singer, John Q, who Patty writes love letters to.  She's desperate to get to a concert where they're playing in a few days, and Simon sees this as an opportunity.

Torrents of foul language and casual antisocial behavior initially put me off, but "Dinner in America" has a raw energy and a subversive attitude that is infectious, and it's clear from very early on that the filmmakers aren't just here to make us all outraged and uncomfortable.  Soon enough scummy Simon turns out to have both a heart and a conscience, and Patty has even more surprises in store.  Their romance is genuinely sweet and it's a blast to watch these two outsiders do battle against the mundane suburbia that keeps them down.  Written and directed by Adam Carter Rehmeir, "Dinner in America" takes aim at unhappy homes and small-minded bullies.  There's a great recurring motif of torturous family meals that act as a microcosm of everyone's terrible family dynamics.

I've seen a few youthful rebellion movies in the same vein as "Dinner in America," and some have worked and some haven't.  I think the reason why this one works is that the couple stay underdogs the whole way through, anarchic but always at a clear disadvantage.   And while Simon embodies the image of the antisocial punk that we're all familiar with, equal narrative weight is given over to Patty, a mild-mannered, average-looking girl who's even more oppressed by cruel social expectations than Simon is.  We end up rooting for Simon to bridge the gap between them, help Patty break out of her shell and embrace her wild side.  In short, "Dinner in America" gives us a good reminder of what the punks are rebelling against, and finds room for a little heart and sympathy amidst all the violence and aggression.

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"The Old Man" and "The Gray Man"

I wouldn't normally pair reviews for a feature film and an ongoing series together, but with these titles, I couldn't resist.  "The Old Man" is an FX spy show starring Jeff Bridges and John Lithgow, who haven't been in anything together before, and get to play off each other as old friends and old spies in some satisfying ways.  Bridges plays Dan Chase, a former CIA operative who has managed to exist off the grid for a few decades, but forces from the past return, and he goes on the run.  Eventually he picks up a traveling companion, a woman named Zoe (Amy Brenneman).  Chase is also being hunted by a hitman named Julian Carson (Gbenga Akinnagbe), an old colleague, who is now high up in the FBI, Harold Harper (Lithgow), and Harper's protege Angela Adams (Alia Shawkat).

"The Old Man" is an unusual series in that it really pushes the characters and their relationships to the forefront, and derives most of the story's twists and turns from those relationships, rather than the usual intrigues of spycraft.  In that sense it feels rather old fashioned, with many of the key scenes coming down to fiery confrontations and heated conversations.  There's still plenty of action in the show, and it's beautifully staged - helping us all pretend that the aging Jeff Bridges is capable of being a world class badass.  However, what it's especially good at is upending the status quo from episode to episode, and constantly making the viewer question their own assumptions about who these characters are.  Zoe, for instance, starts out as something of an unfortunate bystander, and a few episodes later her relationship to Chase has changed completely, and she's revealed herself to be capable of taking control of the situation in a way that's surprising and refreshing.

At the same time, the many shocking revelations and paradigm shifts don't all work, and I expect that those looking for a more traditional kind of spy story might become frustrated by the amount of melodrama.  "The Old Man" wouldn't be as enjoyable if it weren't for the stellar cast helping to smooth over some of the more ridiculous dialogue.  Alia Shawkat feigning indignation during a particularly wild conversation between Adams and Harper struck me as a bridge too far, and it wasn't the last time that happened.  The weakest segments of the show involve flashbacks to a younger Chase (Kenneth Mitchell) during the Soviet-Afghan War, which are too many and too tedious.  Still, when it's Bridges or Lithgow  onscreen, it's so good to see them have the opportunity to play interesting characters.  I had no trouble finishing the seven episode season, which infuriatingly ends on a big cliffhanger.

"The Gray Man," one of Netflix's more pricey action spectacles, is much slicker, more disposable entertainment.  The Russo brothers direct and Ryan Gosling stars as Sierra Six, a felon recruited to be a secret CIA assassin.  He has a target put on his back when he acquires a particular asset from a fellow assassin that's full of incriminating CIA secrets.  His panicking supervisors send a sadistic killjoy contractor named Lloyd Hansen (Chris Evans) after him, target his original recruiter Fitzroy (Billy Bob Thornton), and even kidnap Fitzroy's young niece Claire (Julia Butters) to get him to cooperate.  Six's only ally is CIA agent Dani Miranda (Ana De Armas), who had the bad luck of partnering with him on the mission where he acquired the asset, putting her in danger too.  Alfre Woodard, Jessica Henwick, Rege Jean Page, Dhanoush, and Wagner Moura are also involved as various operatives and handlers.

Ryan Gosling is excellent as an action star, and the Russos essentially turn him into a world-weary Bruce Willis figure here, having him deliver wry one-liners between the action set-pieces, and progressively get more and more beat-up as the movie goes on.  When he gets punched, or stabbed, or lands badly, you wince, and it happens a lot.  The villain is Chris Evans in full dirtbag mode as evil psycho, Lloyd.  He's fun to watch and easy to root against, but never gets to let loose as much as you can tell he wants to.  "The Gray Man," in spite of the relentless amount of destruction, is a very PG-13 action film.  A significant amount of time is spent trying to endear us to Claire, an annoying twelve-year-old who Six gets attached to, and ends up being the major MacGuffin in the movie, because the plot here is totally beside the point.              

    

Compared to other Netflix action movies like "Red Notice" and "6 Underground," "The Gray Man"  isn't bad at all.  However, the film is so generic that it seems an awful shame to have wasted the talents of the Russos, Gosling, Evans, De Armas, and all the rest on it.  The high price tag means that the action is suitably grand scale, and I'm sure plenty of viewers will have a good time with it, but I was hoping for more.       

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My Favorite Henri-Georges Clouzot Film

It's easy to describe Henri-Georges Clouzot as the French Alfred Hitchcock.  Clouzot was most famous for his thrillers, and once even beat Hitchcock to adapting material he was interested in.  This  resulted in the classic "Diabolique," which would go on to inspire "Psycho."  However, Clouzot was equally proficient in other genres, directing the historical romance "Manon," the comedy "Miquette," and the astonishing documentary, "The Mystery of Picasso," which I was very tempted to write this entry about.  And unlike Hitch, Clouzot wrote or co-wrote most of his films.

Still, when I think of Clouzot, I inevitably always come back to "The Wages of Fear," a taut action thriller from the '50s that would be remade in the '70s by William Friedkin as "Sorcerer."  It has some of the greatest suspense sequences ever filmed, following a group of men in South America who have been hired to transport nitroglycerin through rough country on a pair of trucks.  Too much jostling could set off the unstable explosives, killing whoever is close by, so every roadblock becomes a life-or-death situation - boulders in the road, rotting bridges over plunging precipices, oil spills, sharp turns, and worse.  

The film runs over 150 minutes, and nearly the first hour is spent setting up the four men hired to do the job,  and the enormity of the risk they are taking.  Once the actual journey begins, however, their chatter falls away, the spectacular sound design takes over, and the tension becomes unrelenting.  Little by little the danger grows and escalates.  The trucks are sometimes forced to inch their way forward, up a mountain, trying to avoid almost certain disaster.  Every narrow escape just makes the men more paranoid.  The smallest setbacks are magnified to feel insurmountable, and basic car trouble has never seemed more harrowing.  During my first viewing, I hardly noticed the length of the film because I was so absorbed by the suspense.           

I didn't appreciate the themes of "The Wages of Fear" until after multiple viewings.  Clouzot famously considered the film to be about courage.  The four men engaged for the journey have been thrown together by fate, all European expats stuck in a dead-end town, trying to make enough money to escape.  Initially, the job is seen as a windfall, as opportunities are few and far between.   Inevitably, however, the tension becomes too much and they start to lose their nerve.   The filmmaking is bleak and impartial, as the men come to realize that no matter how they struggle, their fates will be decided by luck more than skill.  Where they come from and who they are don't matter in the face of danger.   Our lead, played by Yves Montand, is shown to be an unpleasant brute, but his worst actions are committed out of fear and panic rather than malice or greed.  Acts of bravery seem to be born of instinctual self preservation.  It's a remarkably cynical outlook, one I can't imagine would play well to broader audiences today.  

Then there are the political messages.  For ages, the film could only be accessed in the United States in heavily edited form.  The oil company that hires the desperate men is an American outfit, and clearly an exploitative, unethical one.  They treat the men as expendable, forgoing safer delivery options so that the nitroglycerin can be transported more quickly.  This was deemed too political, and potentially anti-American, so roughly thirty-five minutes of early scenes were deleted from the U.S. version.  Ironically, this is the least successful part of the film, and I suspect that the shorter version plays better because it gets us into the thick of the action faster.

The angry, cynical  tone of the film reflects a filmmaker who was often described as angry and short-tempered on set, with a penchant for nihilistic, misanthropic material.  He was criticized in his time for being pessimistic and morbid, but Clouzot was passionate about his work.   He would go on to further success but his popularity was fairly short-lived and he didn't direct many more films after "Wages of Fear" and "Diabolique."  His most prolific period ended with the death of his wife, Vera, who appeared in three of his films, including "Wages of Fear."  The lone female character, Montand's girlfriend, was created for her by Clouzot.    

What I've Seen - Henri-Georges Clouzot

The Murderer Lives at Number 21 (1942)
Le Corbeau (1943)
Quai des Orfèvres (1947)
Manon (1949)
The Wages of Fear (1953)
Les Diaboliques (1955)
The Mystery of Picasso (1956)
Les Espions (1957)
La Vérité (1960)

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"Stranger Things," Year Four (With Spoilers)

Spoilers for the full series ahead.

                                       

As much as I might complain about weaker plotting or too many characters getting too little time, the Duffers have consistently figured out how to keep "Stranger Things" very engaging and very exciting to watch.  The basic mechanics of scrappy kids fighting monsters has always been rock solid, and there were multiple moments during this year where I got to cheer for the heroes and hiss at the villains in a way that I genuinely haven't in ages.  Not everything pays off, but when something does, it's usually immensely satisfying.  The big Vecna reveal with Nancy was great.  Eleven confronting Bremmer and blowing up the helicopter was great.  Hopper going after demodogs with a sword, and Murray with a flamethrower were great.  Everybody got a little moment to shine, even if it was something as simple as Erica getting to clobber a jock, or Robin talking her way into the sanitarium.  I understand the frustration with certain plotlines getting dragged out, but when those things finally pay off in Season Five, I expect it'll be worth the wait too.

Jamie Campbell Bower is one of the season's MVPs, because he was apparently in that full body Vecna suit during many important scenes.  His introduction as 001/Henry feels a little overdue, and some of the series mythology has clearly been retconned to accommodate him.  However, a Freddy Krueger style villain operating on the same level as Eleven is such a nice change of pace from the demogorgons and mindflayers and assorted moist blobs.  Vecna's confrontation scene with Max was the clear highlight of the year.  I've always appreciated "Stranger Things" for embracing the kind of squishy, tactile, Cronenbergian horror that I grew up on, and not relying so much on CGI.  When the show does use CGI, however, it's perfect.  It took me a while to catch on that the flashbacks to the original Hawkins lab featured a de-aged Millie Bobby Brown, because it's been so long since the first season.  It absolutely blows everything I've seen from the latest Marvel and "Star Wars" shows out of the water, though it's probably not fair to be comparing very different kinds of shows.  

There's been some chatter that the oversized cast should have been pruned down this year, but the Duffers have made it clear that "Stranger Things" is not "Game of Thrones" and we should not be holding our breaths for a high body count.  It's a little disturbing that the fandoms for these franchises have an element that's been so bloodthirsty.  I like all of these characters enough that I don't want to see anybody die.  I like that the Duffers have staunchly refused to give up on the John Hughes elements of the show, and there were significant chunks of the screen time devoted to Robin pining after Vickie (Amybeth McNulty), Steve and Nancy getting closer, and setting up how Eddie and Chrissy (Grace Van Dien) were developing a connection.  And then you have Will failing to confess to Mike and being supported by Jonathan.  And Dustin and Eddie becoming best bros, and Dustin having to break the news to Eddie's uncle.  Max became a lot of people's favorite character this year, because there were real stakes to her story, and "Dear Billy" was this long, intense build-up to her presumed demise - that I hope we all realized that we didn't want to see happen.  

Most of my real complaints about this season come down to the Duffers being given too much leeway and refusing to kill some of their darlings.  The 150 minute finale really was too much of everything, and I can't help wondering if they re-edited the climax to add Kate Bush in response to "Running Up That Hill" going viral.  The downbeat epilogue really should have been a separate episode, given how different the pacing was, and frankly this season could have easily been twelve or thirteen episodes instead of nine.  Several characters and storylines could have used more closure, such as Eleven's bullies, the other basketball guys, Dr. Owen, the military, and Enzo (Tom Wlaschiha).  At least there was proper setup for the fifth season, and we've got plenty of cliffhangers to chew over until it gets here.  I really hope it doesn't take another three years, but if that's what the Duffers need to make a good season of "Stranger Things," I say let them have it.

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"Stranger Things," Year Four (Without Spoilers)

It's been three years since the third season of "Stranger Things," and the Duffer Brothers and their collaborators have made good use of the time.  In a year where we've seen such a crush of prestige streaming series, and Disney+ has been pushing high priced Marvel and "Star Wars" properties, "Stranger Things" is far and away the most impressive series on any platform.  The production rivals anything currently playing in theaters, and totally outclasses any imitator on streaming.  It feels like this is one of the only pieces of media of its kind - a true longform series told with all the resources of blockbuster filmmaking.

There have been debates on the relative merits of the last few seasons, but this year of "Stranger Things" feels like a significant step up.  All the kids except Erica are now in high school.  The adults are almost totally absent - Joyce and Murray spend the whole season traveling to Russia to rescue Hopper from a Soviet prison camp, while the kids are split up between Hawkins and California.  Satanic panic finally reaches Hawkins, as a series of murders puts the high school DnD group, the Hellfire Club, in the crosshairs, with its leader Eddie Munson (Joseph Quinn) as the prime suspect.  The actual culprit is a new villain from the Upside Down that the kids dub Vecna.  Preying on troubled kids, Vecna can psychically murder his victims and seems unstoppable.    

This season's biggest stumbling block is that there are too many characters.  Joyce, Hopper, and Murray are joined by "Game of Thrones" alum Tom Wlaschiha for a very self-contained storyline that is honestly fine as typical action movie fodder.  It's the least impressive part of this season, but it's better material than what these characters have usually had to work with.  The California crew consist of the Byers brothers, Jonathan's new stoner pizza delivery pal Argyle (Eduardo Franco), a visiting Mike, and Eleven - who is quickly whisked away to a secret lab by Sam Owens (Paul Reiser) to try and get her powers back.  The boys get some hijinks and eventually a road trip, but not much else.  The show has been dancing around Will possibly being gay, and Jonathan's relationship troubles with Nancy for two seasons now, probably because it doesn't know what else to do with them. 

Back in Hawkins, the older teenagers - Nancy, Steve, and Robin - mostly have romance on their minds as they help the others delve into the secrets of Vecna and local maniac Victor Creel (Robert Englund).  Eleven, Lucas, and Max are the major characters who become the focus of the season, and actually get full character arcs.  Lucas has joined the basketball team, under the leadership of bullying jock Jason Carver (Mason Dye), and is being pressured to turn his back on his nerdier friends.  Max is still struggling with the aftermath of Season Three spoilers, and becomes one of Vecna's targets.  And then there's Eleven, who gets a chance to confront parts of her past as she tries to reboot herself.  Dustin and Eddie are also pretty prominent, eventually getting a subplot during the big finale all to themselves.

All the actors are as good as they've ever been, but the villains this year are especially vital, creating palpable threats to everybody in the show.  The horror elements in "Stranger Things" have always been great, and now they Duffers are tapping into the slasher side of the genre, specifically the gruesome Freddy Krueger energy that so many '80s horror flicks had.  The nightmare imagery of the Upside Down is more expensive looking, and more varied, giving us new locations and new things to be scared of.  The effects crew really outdid themselves, and as a result "Stranger Things" has never been more exciting or fun to watch as pure spectacle.   As teen drama - well, your mileage will likely vary.  The creators get away with a lot of messy and uneven writing this year, because it's clearly setting up for Season Five, which will reportedly be the last.  

It's clear that the Duffers and Shawn Levy are starting to get too indulgent.  While I generally support variable episode lengths, there was no reason that the finale had to be two and a half hours long, riddled with unnecessary slo-mo shots, and so haphazardly edited.  Splitting the season up into two volumes was smart because it generated a lot more chatter and momentum for the second half, but I think the audience would have been much happier if those two episodes were either much shorter, or just reworked into four episodes.    

More on specific story issues and Vecna next time, with spoilers… 

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Rank 'Em: The Best Picture Winners of the '80s

Decade by decade, I'm ranking the winners of the Academy Award for Best Picture.  From greatest to least great, here's the '80s.  And I warn you that it's been a long while since I've seen a lot of these films.

Amadeus (1984) - This was an easy choice because "Amadeus" is one of my cinematic touchstones.  I've written about it before, so I'll just say here that my appreciation of the film has only grown with time, especially the performances and the use of Mozart's music.  Also, I prefer the original theatrical cut to the Special Edition, and it galls me that it's so much harder to find that version these days.  Other notable nominees of these Oscars included "The Killing Fields" and David Lean's "A Passage to India."

Rain Man (1988) - Dustin Hoffman had an almost miraculous run of great roles, and I always thought that Raymond Babbitt was in many ways the last.  Hoffman did plenty of great work later, but he peaked with Raymond, a savant who is simultaneously both endearing and utterly infuriating.  With Tom Cruise delivering one of his better, truly underappreciated performances, the two have undeniable comedy chemistry, and emotional rapport.  And this fuels a buddy road movie of unusual poignancy and joy.  

Gandhi (1982) - Thank goodness Richard Attenborough cast Ben Kingsley as Mahatma Gandhi over a bigger name.  I cannot conceive of how this movie could have worked otherwise.  "Gandhi" is mostly remembered as a feat of epic filmmaking, with a cast of thousands.  What it really is, even more than it is a biopic, is a country's founding myth.  The Gandhi depicted in the film is not the historical figure, but a human ideal intended to awe and inspire.  Let's face it though.  "E.T." really should have won.

The Last Emperor (1987) - I have to make the disclaimer that nostalgia plays a significant part in how I ranked this film, as it was a big deal in my community to have a film depict this period of Chinese history.  And a massive epic directed by Bernardo Bertolucci, was an especially validating thing to see.  In retrospect, like "Gandhi," this is a simplified and often inaccurate historical biopic.  As spectacle, however, it's cinematic catnip.  And I'm still furious that none of the actors were nominated.

Terms of Endearment (1983) - The beloved James L. Brooks weepie features one of the great onscreen mother/daughter relationships of all time, with stellar performances from Shirley Maclaine and Debra Winger.  I tend to remember this one as a cancer movie more than anything else, with some particularly gutting hospital scenes, and am always presently surprised by the appearance of Jack Nicholson.  However, it's not one of my favorites, and probably wouldn't have won in a more competitive year.

Platoon (1986) - The reputation of "Platoon" boils down to the fact that it's a Vietnam War movie made by a director who actually served and experienced the carnage.  I don't think it's as good as "Apocalypse Now" or "The Deer Hunter," but "Platoon" is undeniably authentic and deeply personal.  It  would also catapult Oliver Stone into the spotlight, and into the right position where he could make better films.  It's a very deserving winner, though I'd argue that Roland Jaffe's "The Mission" is just as good.  

Driving Miss Daisy (1989) - This is a nice, pleasant, feel-good  film, and I bear it no ill will.  The performances are good and the production is solid on every front.  Unfortunately, it reflects a certain attitude from Hollywood about depictions of race relations that has stuck around for way, way too long.  More on that when we get to "Green Book."  I probably would have picked "Born on the Fourth of July" for this year, though "My Left Foot" and "Field of Dreams" were also strong contenders.

Out of Africa (1985) - I have beef with "Out of Africa," because it seems obvious to me that "The Color Purple" should have won Best Picture, with "Witness" in second place.  Lovely cinematography and the John Barry score aside, I don't see how Meryl on her farm in Africa, having a love affair, rates higher.  Maybe I saw this at the wrong time in my life, when I was younger and too impatient, but the romantic colonialist notions and the gallant doomed pilot just failed to hold any interest for me.     

Chariots of Fire (1981) - The Vangelis instrumental is great, but this British sports drama is a bore.  You've got a movie about Olympic runners and anti-Semitism, and it's an unbearable drag.  I barely remember anything positive, and it doesn't surprise me that it's the most notable thing that anyone involved with its creation has made.  Frankly, I'm stumped as to how this beat out heavy hitters like "Reds" and "On Golden Pond."  Even "Raiders of the Lost Ark" would have at least been a memorable choice.   

Ordinary People (1980) - Finally, I hesitate to call this one of the worst Best Picture winners because it's a well-intentioned film about mental health that was pretty daring for its time.  However, it's aged terribly, especially in the way that it demonizes Mary Tyler Moore's character.  It's also one of those unfortunate winners where literally any of the other nominees would have been a better pick.  "Raging Bull" should have won, and if not "Raging Bull," then "The Elephant Man" or "Coal Miner's Daughter."

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