As I got older, and action heroes having pretty (and utterly bland) Asian girlfriends came into vogue, I got pickier. I had more access to Chinese and Japanese media, where there was no shortage of heroines that looked like me, even if they didn't sound like me. That helped quite a bit. I still loved American media, and found a lot of characters like Buffy and Xena who I could cheer for unreservedly. However, I stopped expecting much from American media when it came to representing Asian-Americans. Whenever they did try, it was often very clumsily, or so inauthentically that it stood out like a sore thumb. I appreciated the effort, but sometimes wished that they wouldn't bother.
For a long time I thought that it didn't matter. I made excuses for Hollywood, reasoning that Asian-Americans were a minority in the US, and the status quo of occasional supporting roles was fine. However, a number of whitewashing controversies over the years changed my mind, along with the steadily growing list of Asian-American actors and characters who were slowly making improvements to Asian-American representation. Since then, I've been keeping closer tabs and tallying the little wins over the years. "Fresh Off the Boat" premiered and didn't get cancelled. Thick accents and Chinatown episodes have gradually disappeared. And then, suddenly, this year was the year I finally saw myself onscreen.
I had heard about Ali Wong a few years ago, and some of my cousins have gone to see her stand-up shows live. However, it wasn't until this past spring that I sat down and watched her two specials on Netflix, about the struggles of becoming a wife and mother. She's super sexually explicit, relatable, funny, and an Asian-American woman who is my age. She's also a regular on the ABC sitcom "American Housewife" and has written for "Fresh Off the Boat." I really regret not watching more network television now, because I might have stumbled across her refreshingly no-holds-barred brand of comedy sooner. Sitcoms, alas, just haven't been my thing for a long while.
I do, however, occasionally enjoy a good romantic comedy. "Fresh Off the Boat" matriarch Constance Wu is currently starring in the high profile "Crazy Rich Asians," which I haven't seen yet, but absolutely will once I get the chance. Wu plays the outsider marrying into a rich family, but in this case she's a Chinese-American woman marrying into a family of Singaporean real estate developers. Her future mother-in-law is played by my eternal girl crush, Michelle Yeoh. I don't think I've seen a romantic comedy from a proper Chinese-American perspective since Ang Lee's films from the early '90s, and certainly nothing so high profile since, well, ever.
And to top it all off, there's the runaway success of "Killing Eve," the BBC America series about an MI5 agent hunting a female serial killer. The MI5 agent, Eve Polastri, is played by "Grey's Anatomy" alum Sandra Oh. Serial killer procedurals are one of my biggest guilty pleasures, and I watched this one with increasing glee. I have a proper review coming soon, but I'll just say here that it is so good to see Sandra Oh again, and in a major Emmy-nominated leading role. This is going to further cement her as a major star, and it's been so long in coming. It felt like "Killing Eve" appeared out of nowhere, and I might have missed it completely if it weren't for all the good press.
But like all overnight successes, it takes thirty years to get there. And this sudden confluence of so much media starring Asian-American women over thirty didn't happen by accident. I've got to say it is a strangely empowering feeling to be the target audience for once, to be the person that a piece of media is aimed at and talking to directly. Sure, other people will watch and enjoy all the shows and movies that I listed, but they'll be doing what I've been doing for pretty much my entire life - putting themselves in someone else's shoes. And this time around, I didn't have to jump through hoops to find the media - it all but came looking for me.
Representation does matter, no matter who you are. Even if this turns out to be a momentary trend that fades away quickly, I'll remember this feeling. And I'll keep my eyes peeled for the next season of "Killing Eve" and Ali Wong's romantic-comedy with Randall Park next year, "Always Be My Maybe." And though I'll never get my big screen superhero movie starring someone who looks like me, maybe my kids will.
So happy watching everyone. And Wakanda forever.
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