I so wanted this one to be good. "The Major and the Minor" was one of the few major Billy Wilder films I hadn't seen yet, his debut as a Hollywood director. Wilder also collaborated on the script with his writing partner Charles Brackett. The pair had previously been responsible for the classic romantic comedies "Ninotchka," "Midnight," and "Ball of Fire." Unfortunately, "The Major and the Minor" has one of those stories that just doesn't work after seventy years, because it hinges on believing that thirty-something Ginger Rogers could pass herself off as a twelve year-old girl.
Rogers stars as Susan Applegate, a young woman who has decided to quit the bright lights of New York City to go home to small town Iowa. Unfortunately a rise in train fares means that she only has enough money to buy a half-fare child's ticket. So, with her stockings swapped for ankle socks and her hair in pigtails, she bluffs her way onboard, only to wind up in the company of Major Philip Kirby (Ray Milland), who insists on looking after her. When the train is held up, Susan, calling herself Su-Su, goes along with Major Kirby to the military academy where he is employed. There, Su-Su has to contend with Major Kirby's manipulative fiancée Pamela (Rita Johnson), Pamela's kid sister Lucy (Diana Lynn), a real twelve-year-old girl, and the attentions of every young cadet in the academy.
I know things were different in 1942. Judy Garland got away with playing a little girl named Dorothy Gale in "The Wizard of Oz" only a few short years earlier. Rogers certainly throws herself into the performance, modulating her voice, playing around with different degrees of baby talk and precociousness to very charming effect. However, the illusion just doesn't hold up after all this time. When Susan is on the train, we understand why the conductors suspect her because the fakery is so obvious. Ginger Rogers was simply not one of those actresses who could pull off looking like a little girl. Major Kirby's confusion can be forgiven because he has a "bum eye," though you have to wonder how that affects his military eligibility. However, once Susan arrives at the military academy, nobody aside from the real twelve-year-old questions Susan's appearance for a moment. It's too much to take.
And then there are the uncomfortable implications of the story if we do buy that Major Kirby really believes that Susan is a twelve-year-old girl. The movie portrays him as a straight-arrow good guy with absolutely nothing illicit on his mind, but he clearly develops romantic feelings for her by the end of the film. It wouldn't have been so bad if little Su-Su was meant to be fifteen or sixteen years old, but twelve is clearly prepubescent and that sets off all the alarm bells. As long as the trickery and misunderstandings were played for laughs, I could give the film the benefit of the doubt, but once Susan becomes a real contender for the Major's affections, that was something else entirely. The script does what it can to counter this, to make the romance between Susan and the Major as innocent as possible, but you simply couldn't get away with it today.
Ginger Rogers' performance is really the only thing in the film worth remembering. Her comedic timing is great, she pulls off a great transformation from pretend schoolgirl into a lovely, mature woman as the script requires, and Wilder and Brackett give her some fun dialogue to play with. I only knew Rogers from her song-and-dance pictures with Fred Astaire, but her performance here makes me want to look up more of her work. Milland and Johnson are a typical screen nice guy and mean girl respectively, not much to talk about. Diana Lynn, playing the science enthusiast little sister, starts out as promisingly abrasive, but she really doesn't get enough to do to leave a real impression. Ditto the various cadets who court Susan and the other minor characters.
As for Billy Wilder's direction, it's completely competent for a light comedy and nothing the least bit special. This was his first major directing job, after all, still two years before "Double Indemnity" and "Lost Weekend," and eight before the career high of "Sunset Boulevard." We can consider this an important stepping stone for him, but it's definitely not one of his better films as either a director or a writer.
However, I will admit that I am a little curious about the 1955 remake of "The Major and the Minor," entitled "You're Never Too Young," where the genders are switched and Jerry Lewis plays a grown man trying to pass himself off as a youngster. Maybe the film would work better with more slapstick and silliness, and less emphasis on the questionable romance.
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