While I'm happy that Scarlett Johanssen's Natasha Romanov, aka Black Widow, finally has her own movie, it couldn't be plainer that this is an afterthought, a retroactive attempt to beef up a character that the MCU is pretty much done with, and to use the audience's affection for her to introduce and propel several other characters forward. For one thing, I'm pretty sure that "Black Widow" is the MCU's first prequel - or maybe midquel. It takes place just after "Age of Ultron," when Natasha is on the run. She reunites with Yelena Belova (Florence Pugh), a fellow victim of the evil Dreykov (Ray Winstone) and his Red Room that trained them to be super spies. Natasha and Yelena discover a chance to take down Dreykov for good, which means reuniting with their old surrogate parents - Alexei Shostakov, the Red Guardian (David Harbour) and Melina Vostokoff (Rachel Weisz).
"Black Widow" has a very dark and creepy title sequence that looks like something that "Se7en" era David Fincher might come up with, alluding to crimes and abuses in Natasha's past that are definitely not in PG-13 territory. However, this is as dark as "Black Widow" ever gets. The movie deliberately sidesteps the more serious material, even making light of some of Natasha and Yelena's past trauma. "Black Widow" is an action thriller, but also has the surprising conceit of being something of a dysfunctional family sitcom at its core. As we learn in the opening scenes, Natasha, Yelena, Alexei, and Melina were Russian sleeper agents that were placed together as a fake family unit in the United States in the 90s. It was the closest thing to a real family that Natasha and Yelena ever had, so most of the movie is about reestablishing these old family bonds - this time by choice.
The spy thriller maneuverings of the plot are fairly predictable, and it was never more obvious that director Cate Shortland and the people in charge of all the action scenes had very little to do with each other, but the movie is slick and entertaining, and it mostly leaves a good impression. The new characters are very engaging, especially Yelena and Alexei. The humor is brisk and sarcastic. The one issue I have, which is actually very common for MCU films, is that the hero with her name on the movie is one of the least interesting things about it. Natasha gets to show off her moves, take care of unfinished business, and have her big showdowns, but she's so dry and stoic that it's hard to do much more than admire her from a distance. "Black Widow" is actually better as a Yelena movie, and I don't think it's a coincidence that Florence Pugh is already set to reprise her role in other Marvel projects.
Now, "Gunpowder Milkshake" is a piece of disposable action fluff that is mercifully self-contained, and manages a few moments of genuine fun amidst two hours of deeply mediocre schtick. It stars Karen Gillan as Sam, an assassin who exists in a cartoonish universe adjacent to the "John Wick" and "Kingsmen" universes. One day she kills the wrong man, and then finds herself in the position of being the only person who can rescue an eight-year-old girl named Emily (Chloe Coleman) from terrible harm. She ends up having to call on the assistance of her estranged mother Scarlet (Lena Headey), and her mother's friends - a group of female assassins who operate out of a library: Anna May (Angela Bassett), Florence (Michelle Yeoh), and Madeleine (Carla Gugino).
This is a European production, helmed by non-Americans earnestly trying to evoke American cultural signifiers like diners and bowling alleys in very hyper stylized terms. So, everything feels very plasticine, very belabored, and not remotely genuine. The execution is so heavy handed that it ruins some of the cuter conceits like the library safehouse hiding weapons and supplies in various ironically titled books. The characters are flat and the dialogue is uniformly terrible. The film is an absolute slog for the first act, really until Sam and Emily finally have to face off against a group of goons sent by Emily's employers. It's the action scenes where "Gunpowder Milkshake" finally finds its footing. There's a great fight sequence where Sam's arms have been temporarily paralyzed, and the goons are heavily injured and high on laughing gas. Then there's a car chase sequence in a parking structure where Emily is obliged to drive the car, sitting in Sam's lap.
So, if all you really want is a flashy shoot-em-up where a bunch of talented actresses get to posture and look cool, you could do worse. The Zach Snyder style slow motion indulgences, and Paul Giamatti in sleazeball villain mode are what they are, and it feels petty to call them out for being exactly what they've been advertised to be. To its credit, "Gunpowder Milkshake" isn't exploitative or sleazy, and avoids some of the worst tropes of this particular subgenre. I came away feeling pretty good about it, moderately entertained and open to more.
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